Eight years have passed since then and two years have past since I wrote Hair Raising Issue, my first ever blog that focused on the acceptance of weave and the perceived mainstream dislike of short and natural hair. My initial reluctance soon turned to intrigue as my thoughts and behaviour have changed since then. This blog is an honest account of my experience wearing weave, people’s reactions and my conclusions. This is about The weave and I.
I walked into Dionne’s salon like this
And walked out like this…
I actually looked in the mirror and got a shock. My reflection starring back at me wasn't me, or should I say, wasn't the me that I recognised. I looked totally different and I think for a couple of seconds my eyes and brain were confused. I looked fabulous yet felt strange. Richard Barr did a fantastic job. This was my ANTM moment and if Tyra Banks was watching I would have failed the task. I really found it hard to “switch it on”, not because I'm shy, not because I was nervous but because I didn’t know how to BE… be myself with this new accessory. Makeovers are great as you can be whatever you want, but I wanted to still be me and show me in my authentic self not alter ego or anything exaggerated. I like the main chosen picture as I see me within it when looking at my eyes.
I went to bed dreading what my work colleagues would think as in under 24 hours I had gained an extra 22 inches of hair. The next morning I walked into the office and here is where my weekly concise diary begins…
Week one:
Those that didn’t walk past me did a double take and then stopped to say…
“Your hair looks beautiful today”
“You look beautiful”
“Omg you like Naomi Campbell, why are you working here? You should be on the catwalk”
“You’re stunning”
“Now you look like a princess”
“You look hot”
“Omg you look very beautiful”
“With long hair you look prettier; with short hair you look sophisticated”
“Very sexy”
Question: How much does hair length define what is beautiful?
Lesson: Lip gloss, weave and wind don’t go together
Huh? Bumped into my ex-boyfriend and he said that I looked like a boring Librarian who doesn’t know how sexy she is!
Funny: Why am I stroking my hair like it’s a cat?
Random: I must be the only black person who offers people to touch her silky weaved hair. Don’t get it twisted though, do not touch the tracks!
End of week thought: If I had low self-esteem I think I would have gained a complex about how I look with my short hair and as a result may choose to wear weave on a more permanent basis because the comments were so flattering. Instead I found myself re-affirming to myself and others that I was beautiful anyway and this new addition was not a permanent fixture. I also began to warmly challenge some of the comments to gain a wider perspective. Beauty is subjective however it would appear that hair length plays a large part in what attracts men to women. Caucasian women found me more attractive with long hair, whilst black women liked the long though those who knew me before, preferred the short. Men of all races loved the weave.
Week 2:
Question: How do you successfully grease your scalp when there is a closure in the way?
Lesson: When sipping tea or eating soup you MUST flick your hair out the way or hold it- each time… this is LONG!
Huh? My level of awareness has reduced because the hair gets in my way. I have blind spots when stepping out in the road. Ha ha!
Funny: I’m shocked at the number of men who are jealous that the weave procedure cannot work for them.
Random: I have noticed the way other weave weavers look at my weave, yes the weave not me. The difference between a good weave and a bad one is evident. As a result weave envy exists as does a whole new take on the notion of “good hair”.
End of week thought: I cannot fully embrace the weave. It is part of me (at the moment) but it is not me. “I am not my hair” said Indie which I also identify with, however the power of hair cannot be overlooked. I haven’t changed though it feels other people expect me too. Long hair is somehow associated with being a diva, in ways that dreads tend to signify someone who is conscious. I identify more with dreads due to being spiritual but as the saying goes “You don’t need to be dread to be Rasta”. I am more diva, secure, confident and the rest with short hair.
The weave and I departed after two weeks. It wasn’t quite a love affair nor was it a love/hate relationship, but it was interesting to see how I was received by others and how this new accessory made me feel. The trigger that ended the weaves life on my head was… the weave pat. I caught myself doing the wave pat...
source:weave pat
and it had to go.
Weave is fabulous for a change in appearance and the rest, however it is just not for me. I did not wear the weave with pride as a result I think it changed my personality and to strangers I may have appeared shy or awkward in a quirky Absolutely Fabulous type of way
I know 2 major extremes. I say this as with good friends I noticed I became exaggerated in a comical way. I can’t fully explain why, the only thing that is coming up and resonating with me is that I was almost apologetic for wearing this thing that is stitched into my hair and I found the humorous side of it and damn I wished I filmed it.
There are numerous reasons why I don’t like weave on me, some I have explained within this article already, the other part is that I am slightly boring, I like what I like and whilst many see the positive’s in weaving various weaves, for me it feels like dress up, and I hate dress up. I also felt hidden, like I was wearing some sort of veil. This sounds strange but this is how I internally felt.
This has been an interesting experience and I thank Black Hair and the team for the makeover. For me there is a conclusion, however I fully acknowledge it is one based on my experience and therefore is nothing more than subjective. I love my short hair. I feel seen and I feel that my features are allowed to pop out. Everybody has a preference and I wish magazines would also represent and celebrate short hair more. Beauty (in my eyes) does not lie in length, it lies in features which the hair enhances or hides. So shine in whatever shows the best of you.
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